Setback

[gee4]

Not sure how to start this but let's just say, I've had an interim review with my 2 bosses half way through my induction period.  Whilst I thought I was making progress (given first 2 weeks were induction), it appears bods are not 100% happy.  I was shocked but have tried to take everything on board.  

It seems I am not communicating enough, not in their faces telling them what they want to hear/what I am doing/what's happening.  My predessor was so busy with payroll and fleet cars (now removed from my role) that she hadn't the time to give them all her attention.  Now it seems whilst I am at my desk doing my work, they'd prefer I pop in 10 times or more every day to communicate.  It's not in my nature to "pop" in unless I need to discuss work, or have docs signed, or leave mail, or collect work from them - I am busy!!

That was last Wed.  Thur and Fri I spent on tenderhooks making more of an effort to communicate, pop in and let them know what I was working on, what I had in pipeline.  So far it seems ok, but I sense an atmosphere.  I caught both of them on phone to each other on Fri and was completely paranoid they were talking about me.  Yes I have been hired to do a job, but no I have not stepped out of line or struggled with work.  I am pleasant and polite and have not refused to carry out any work or attend meetings.

My questions are -

1.  Are they taking advantage of me since the previous PA was too busy?
2.  Are they just making sure I am busy enough and they are gettnig enough out of
    me?
3.  Am I being paranoid?
4.  Do I have reason to worry that I still have a job in 6 weeks time?
5.  Was my 2 week induction too long eg. should I have been at my desk sooner?

I have spoken to friends to ascertain how PA's are perceived in their company and the reply was, they are loners...they do lunch alone, not socialising with anyone in the company.  I suspect my bosses want me to be their eyes and ears and if it's a tout they want, I am not sure I want to be here - that's not what I am about.  I have overcome my 2 week absence from my desk and established relationships with other colleagues who I can now lunch with - is that wrong?  Do my bosses think I should be a loner and keep myself aloof?

Your advice here would be helpful.

[JessW]

Gee, this sounds similar to what was happening here but (hopefully) without the sole-destroying, backstabbing line manager thrown in to add insult to injury.

It is a new trend with bosses or rather their expectations of our profession?  I certainly hope not!

Could it be the visible death of the ability of bosses to provide constructive assessments of ability within a job?  Perhaps.

Is it something you should take personally?  I would have thought that so long as you do your job to the best of your ability, accurately, efficiently and with a neutral outward exposure, then you can do no more than that.

Is there something else going on within the (social?) infrastructure of the firm that you are not aware of at the moment and would, in the normal course of life, not concern you?  Maybe.

Others may have a different perspective, but I do feel this sort of behaviour shows more against the critical bods than the target (namely us).

Big hugs and a large glass of something alcoholic waiting for you on Friday evening...

Jess

Edited by jwaddington on 10/10/06 11:45 AM.

[raindance]

Great advice from Jess.

You could go back to your two bosses and ask for clarification, and maybe tactfully put them on the spot so that you can flush out whether "communicating" actually means "gossiping" or "tale telling".  

You might also suggest that you touch base with them briefly a couple of times a day - on the basis that it will keep them updated but will mean that they can devote the necessary time to their very busy jobs.  Reminding them that they are "very busy" and you "don't with to disturb them unnecessarily" will (a) make them feel important  (b) get your point across and (c) hopefully gain you some time.

It may be that this behaviour is just the way your bosses manage things, and you either adapt to it, and change what little you can change, or find another post.  Some managers do micro-manage, and probably should do everything themselves because that is really the only way they would be satisfied.  It is possible to "train"  a micro-manager out of their bad habits, but you will have to invest a lot of time and patience.  

Your managers also have to adapt to you and your demeanour.  With your experience, I don't need to tell you that politeness and excellent work are only part of the equation in building up a working relationship.  A good working relationship takes a lot of time to develop, and you maybe need to give it more time, particularly if your predecessor was in post for a long time.  

I don't think you have much to worry about, Gee, on the basis of what you have said, but let us know if anything else happens.

With best wishes,

Raindance

[gee4]

Thanks Jess and Rain.  

I have discussed "communication" and they have said they want me in their faces even if it means being in their office 10 times a day.  They also mentioned one incident which happened recently after our conference where there was a potential fight looming (in the wee small hours) and one of our managers had to placate the person who was actually a guest.  Apparently my bosses were appauled that I did not report this to them.  I didn't think it was my place since a manager sorted it and it seems they already got wind of it -  they seem to want me to keep them informed of all that goes on - a tout!  You back us and we'll back you type of thing.

All I can do is ride the storm and see where it leads.  I still feel today there is an atmosphere and after having lunched today with 4 guys who sit near me (including Joe), I am still not sure I am doing the right thing or what they want.

[raindance]

You're employed to do a job, Gee; you haven't entered a Carthusian monastery and taken a vow of absolute silence.

Establishing working relationships with your colleagues is part of fitting into your new role.

Your bosses have no right to demand - in an overt or implied manner - that you don't speak to anyone else and report every little detail to them if you do have the temerity to do so.  

You've always struck me as a confident and competent woman, so I can see from this and other recent posts that something in this new job is getting to you.  If it isn't a colleague who blanks you, it's your bosses who expect you to work in monastic silence and at the same time report every little bit of gossip (which may explain the "blanking" thing).  Are these people that you, with your integrity, would really like to work for (not very good grammar but it's the best I can do early in the afternoon and with a humungous cold)?

Best wishes,

Raindance

[emma138]

Hi Gee

I think you've had some really good advice so far so I don't have much to add.  One thing I have wondered is whether or not you agreed probation targets with your line managers when you started your role.  These should be written down with agreed measures that will allow you and your bosses to objectively assess your performance and whether or not you have passed your probation when the time comes.  For example, communication as a target is far to all-encompassing and should be allocated specific performance measures, e.g. report budget position on 15th of each month, produce weekly report of staff attendance, report instances of aggression directed at other members of staff (!!)  Don't be afraid to sit your bosses down and agree specific performance targets.

[countrigal]

Gee, just a side-note.  In my positions in the past where I was the admin for a boss in a high-profile role, I did see it as my position to keep him informed of potential flare-ups or problems (even between employees) which might become their problems or come to their attention.  In my words to them, I didn't want them going into a meeting and hearing about it from someone else, especially one of their bosses, and not know immediately what was being talked about.  It makes them look ineffectual in their role as manager.  So you might look at this the same way... tell them of flare-ups that occur, what has been done to regulate them, etc, just so they don't get blind-sided if they are asked about it later.  This isn't "tattling" or gossiping or anything, but ensuring that you are keeping your boss informed of what is going on in the office while he/she is not able to do that.  This doesn't have to be negative... if employee #1 is having an altercation with employee #2 and employee #3 (or supervisor or whomever) steps in and resolves this, then you are reporting what good employee or communication skills employee #3 has.  The fact that employee #1 and 2 were in an altercation is the unimportant fact... the importance is how #3 handled it.  Now bossie doesn't have to deal with #1 and #2, who may have had an ongoing issue... #3 has dealt with it.  Or bossie now knows that the issue which he may have thought was already dealt with has not been resolved but also now knows how good #3 is at smoothing bumpy roads.  As an office manager, knowing how the office is running, including the bumps that are occurring, is necessary in order to be effective.  If bossie never knew that anything handed to #1 was always argued over, delayed, and ultimately done by #2, then bossie would be giving #1 credit for everything that #2 was doing and they would not be getting all the credit that is due them for doing #1's items as well as their own.

Also, if you know that an employee is having a bad day... it's always nice to share that with bossie.  Perhaps you know that employee X has recently lost a cat/dog, then you can share that with bossie and bossie can score brownie points by stopping by and saying a quick "I'm sorry to hear of your loss" and be a caring boss.  Good bosses aren't good on their own, they have great admins who keep them abreast of everything and allow them to put their good features forward.

Just another view on what is being requested of you...

CountriGal
Peer Moderator

[gee4]

Thank you all.  I guess my main worry is that if I don't "shape up" soon I'll be out, even though we are planning ahead, for Christmas, next year etc.  I have never got that personal with any boss and don't discuss my personal life with them in return.  I know from previous postings that CG has mentioned her "personal"  involvement and yes while that is good and keeping on side, maybe I'm more of a team player than a personal assistant.

The point is this has really knocked me for 6 and I am constantly watching my back, trying not to be over friendly with other colleagues - but to be honest it's too late.  Everyone now knows my personality and how I interact.  I think perhaps my bosses see that and are not happy they are not getting the attention they previously got.

I had to laugh at Rain's comments - no I don't work in a monastry but I am not your typical 39 year old - yes 39 last month!  I am young and single and have more of a young outlook and attitude than most people my age.  Don't get me wrong I dress appropriately for my age and am professional but my attitude is not typical of those my age.

PS.  Probationary period is 3 months which is why they felt the need for a review half way through.  I lunched with 4 guys today so not sure how well that even went down!

[JessW]

Gee, remember something very important!  

Probationary periods go both ways.  If this is not what you want in a job you can always chose to reject them.  

This is what I have done in essence (and they will be the poorer for it).  I don't believe I am being big headed about it, but I would rather be the one who said this is not something I can, will or should have to cope with/handle than them saying I wasn't good enough for some mythical standard that they themselves cannot put into plain english.

Jess


PS it also looks very bad for the bosses to their bosses if new starters leave either during or on completion of their probationary period.

[msmarieh]

It's always interesting to me to read the various perspectives that people bring to the table. There are several thoughts that ran through my head as I read your posting and the follow up replies.

The first is that I don't see anywhere in your original topic that they said you are not to talk to people. Nowhere in your summary of their comments did I see any indication that you needed to reduce your interaction with other people. Just because they are loners it doesn't mean they want you to be a loner. And if they do want you to advise them of things going on in the office, that doesn't mean they want you to run and tell them that Susie Q. is having an affair with the milkman. Keeping your boss aware of what is going on does not make you any less of a team player.

Secondly, you gave the reason fairly clearly in your post that they appear to have concerns about. The last individual did not give them as much information as they desired. Therefore they are asking you for regular feedback. At this point they don't know you and they don't know how well they can trust you or your judgment. They want to be kept abreast of things that occur or could possibly "blow up" in the office. This is perfectly reasonable to request.

I am at a complete loss to understand why you would think they were taking advantage of you??? Can you expand on what you were thinking with this?

Truthfully, I do think you are being somewhat paranoid. However, that doesn't mean that they aren't happy with you or that you are unwise to watch your back during this probationary period. It does mean, though that you need to step back and remove your emotions from this conversation to focus on what they are actually asking for and how you can provide it.

The bottom line is that it seems to me that they have been quite clear in what they desire: More Communication.

You just need to determine the most effective method of accomplishing their desired end result.

Ask them if they would like a daily email summarizing what you were working on, what progress you have made on their requests, issues you are facing etc. It doesn't have to be a long drawn out production, it can be a short summary of each item. As countrigal mentioned, most bosses would strongly prefer to not be blindsided by office situations that may arise, so notifying them of significant events in the office can be helpful. I always considered this to be a part of my job - keeping my boss aware of potential problems before they became problems. My bosses have always appreciated this. I did not however report "gossip" unless it was significant to the business (i.e. rumors of a corporate sale for instance).

Alternatively, you can drop them a quick email as you complete tasks - fyi bossie, I finished the xyz project you requested.

They have opened up a dialog with you and provided you with input on how you can do your job more effectively for their purposes. This is valuable feedback and you need to do what you can to not take it personally, but instead think about how you can meet their needs.

It's likely that over time, as they get to know you better, see that you are doing the things they have asked you to do, less prolific updates will be needed. Perhaps you can settle on a once a week update report.

I highly doubt that your two week induction has any relevance to this matter whatsoever.

My boss and I had a similar conversation after I started. While my first inclination was to jump to the conclusion that he was micromanaging and didn't trust that I had done what he requested, I stepped back mentally and instead observed. I discovered that it was actually a doublecheck for himself because he couldn't remember if he has asked me to do certain things or not and he couldn't remember if he had promised followup on certain things or not. It was not (contrary to my first impressions) "all about me". It was actually about him and how he worked. These comments aren't always meant to be "personal".

Marie

[countrigal]

And to piggyback on what MsMarie has stated... you asked others how they perceived PA's in other companies... this was not what your boss's said or the impression they gave you of what they wanted (ie: the loner).  You don't have to stop eating with others and making contacts and being friendly to do what they have requested of you.  If you feel this is demeening you, to have to report every hour or whatever, on what you're doing, where you are on a project, etc, then this might not be a good fit for you.  But remember, you are on probation and they don't yet really know your work skills, ethics, etc and may have a wholly altruistic reason for asking for these updates rather than the "out to get you" reason that you seem to have taken from this.  Do your job, remain professional, and listen to the feedback that they give you and you may find that they need fewer and fewer updates from you and you will have grown with your position.

A good bit of advice for anyone in any situation is to put yourself in the other person's shoes...  Try to see things their way...  Can you see why they may or may not be acting or requesting how/what they are?  Especially when it's a new position and both the hiree and hired are trying to really determine the fit of the role and personality, and what duties should/shouldn't be done at this point, etc.  It may simply be that your predecesor had so many duties that she was unable to do all that they wanted, and they are simply wanting to keep abreast of your duties and how long it takes you so that they can see if they can add to your duties, develop the role more (down the road) etc.  Not all is a negative.

Gee, just remain your positive, professional self and do your best to give them what they want while you wait to see where this is going.  Head up, smile, and things will be what they will be.  But you know your skills, they just have to learn.

CountriGal
Peer Moderator

[gee4]

Marie and CG, last comments much appreciated.

That said, I have at all times communciated with my bosses.  It's difficult at times as they may have someone in the office with them or are busy themselves.  I go in everymorning with post and anything that needs signed and let them know what I have completed and where I am - just been in now with them.  I take on board what you have said but I feel like I am back at school, being monitored, watched, spied on and it doesn't feel good.  

The reason I said I felt taken advantage of is that I am new and sometimes people push more onto you and put you into a situation where you have nothing to compare it to.  I am attending various meetings for one bosse's team but hardly do any diary management or paperwork for him - he's told me he's more or less self-sufficient - so what can I do?  The other boss needs more involvement as regards organising events, diary etc but I do not attend any meeting for his team - they are both very different.

The culture of the business is great and they've said I fit into that but I feel they are completely nit-picking as all my work has been done on time and to the best of my ability - heck it takes at least 12 months of being in a job to completely know everything.  They also hate communicate by email and do not deal with formal reports so the idea of me emailing them with a weekly or daily report is a no-no.

Thanks again for your comments.

[msmarieh]

How about voicemail messages? Would that be an alternative? I used to send one boss text message updates.

Otherwise, schedule time on the calendar for 2-3 15 minute periods for daily updates. Yes, it may feel like monitoring, but hopefully it will be shortterm and it's actually a great opportunity for more interaction with your bosses. Many admins would love to have the opportunity to get 15 minutes on the calendar with their boss every day, as they feel like they can't even get 15 minutes a week!

Chin up. It doesn't sound like anything too awful. You just need to adjust your thinking and consider how best to give them what they want. Also, be sure to talk to them in a non-argumentative way (stay factual) about the impact of your workflow if you have to interrupt it too often to find them to update them. Approach it from a "how can we best meet both our needs and make sure you have all the information you need" perspective.

Marie

[gee4]

No voicemail, no email and no reports - talk, talk, talk.  I wasn't aware I wasn't talking but now that I am I feel I need to be doing it every hour on the hour.

One boss sits in an office in front of my desk the other in an office to the left, so there really is no reason for emails back and forward - that would make me look like I really didn't want to talk to them.

Anyway I've got same feedback from friends also so hopefully I can turn things around.  I am a quite person generally so unless I'm at lunch or out socially I can appear very quiet to others.

[gee4]

Now after all the fuss of the past week, I find myself one boss down due to annual leave and second one down due to meeting offsite until 1pm - completely bored this morning and have no idea how I will get today in given that there is little or nothing for me to do - help!