New banking procedures A bank recently installed a series of
drive-through ATM machines that allow customers to draw money without leaving the safety
of their vehicles. In order to avoid any confusion, the bank posted instructions
to all of its clients so that when they make use of these new, convenient ATM
facilities, they will know exactly what to do. For ease of reference, The Instructions were split between male and female
PROCEDURE FOR MALE CUSTOMERS
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Wind down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Wind up window.
7. Drive off.
PROCEDURE FOR FEMALE CUSTOMERS
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Reverse a bit to align car window with cash machine.
3. Restart the stalled engine.
4. Wind down the window.
5. Find handbag, remove all contents onto passenger seat to locate card.
6. Turn the radio down.
7. Attempt to insert card into machine.
8. Open car door to allow easier access to cash machine due to its excessive distance from car.
9. Insert card.
10.Re-insert card the right way up.
11.Re-enter handbag to find diary with PIN written on the inside back page.
12.Enter PIN.
13.Press ‘Cancel’ and re-enter correct PIN.
14.Enter amount of cash required.
15.Check make up in rear view mirror.
16.Retrieve cash and receipt.
17.Empty handbag again to locate purse and place cash inside.
18.Place receipt in back of cheque book.
19.Re-check make up.
20.Drive forward two metres
21.Reverse back to cash machine.
22.Retrieve card.
23.Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder and place card inside.
24.Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25.Drive for 2 or 3 kilometres.
26.Release hand brake.
Suze
