Message #54530

[raindance]

I think your boss was being quite kind to you.  He seems to have received a few "complaints" from people about you, and has decided to have an informal chat with you rather than a full-blown disciplinary meeting.  

The image we portray to others, particularly at work, is very important.  That image is expressed through our punctuality, our demeanour, speech, dress,  the way we speak on the phone, the way we make demands on our colleagues' time and expertise, the respectful and courteous way we treat others.   It all goes towards being professional.  It isn't about being "nice" to people - sometimes one can be too "nice".  Other people generally want to have people around them who are capable and competent,  pleasant, fun, have integrity and are straightforward.  

You might wish to look at books by Judi James (search for her books on Amazon).  She is a very good writer on work-related issues.

I once had an unfortunate experience, similar to yours, when I was first starting out in my professional career.  My boss at the time asked me, very gently, whether I enjoyed my job.  I remember being quite affronted, but afterwards reflected on the conversation we had had, and decided that I wanted to move on.  Looking back, I realize that I was in COMPLETELY the wrong job, and that my boss had done me a very great service.  I have never looked back, so to speak.  Although there have been some ups and downs since then, my career has prospered.  

So, I would advise you to:

Reflect carefully on what your boss has said to you
See what areas you can improve immediately and what you can improve in the longer term
Ask yourself whether you want to stay in this job and why, or whether there is something else you would rather do
Make sure you have a good work/life balance, and plenty of hobbies and outside-of-work interests
Maybe take some courses at your local college to add to your professional knowledge or develop an interest

and last, but not least, be nice to yourself.  

Best wishes,

Raindance