Message #71858

[msmarieh]

Gee, I am inclined to agree with you that the colleague should take Alice to lunch, however, that is what it is. I didn't suggest that Alice pay for her colleague's lunch, merely eat with her.

I am not siding with either side here. I am merely giving an alternative perspective to consider. I think some people (and I am not referring to Alice here, simply in general) make *themselves* the victim by looking for offense where none was necessarily intended. It causes untold amounts of grief and drama where it is completely unnecessary.

Do I think we should forgive everyone every time? No, I don't. As I indicated in my post though, there is a difference between a first offense and a repeated pattern. I don't encourage anyone to be gullible. However, there are myriad ways to be assertive in correcting relationships and I happen to believe in trying to work it out with people rather than throwing hissy fits and acting like a drama queen.

Alice, I wish you well in determining your next course of action. I hope you will consider which resolutions will best help your professional development and career. As it's commonly said, we can't choose what actions happen to us, but we can choose our reactions to the situations.