Message #54519

[geminigirl]

I had a taste of this about 15 or so years ago, when I was working as a secretary alongside a much older woman.  If one of the chaps we were working for (we worked for a number of architects) came up and asked a question, I would just go ahead and answer it straight away.  I *may* have answered the question once or twice (!) when it wasn't directly addressed to me and she didn't like it.  In hindsight, I think she saw this as a threat from a much younger woman.  Her attitude to me went rapidly downhill and I had no clue what was causing it so eventually asked her straight out if I'd offended her, and that's when she told me.  I addressed the problem immediately and "spoke only when spoken to" - biting my tongue several times.

It got so bad, even after that, that I took it up with the Head Secretary.  Her response was that X had been here that much longer than me that if the problem wasn't resolved (even though I thought then that it had been) I would be the one that had to leave.

It was very uncomfortable for a while.

It's a very hard situation that you're finding yourself in, you have my sympathies.  It's never nice to be criticised, however nicely or "constructive" the "discussion" is.  I can't point you in any direction but I'm sure that other DDers will be able to.

Gee's questions were on the nail, though - do you like your job?  Are you happy there?

Stay positive and let us know how you get on.